I'm Baaaack!!!

Sorry to be MIA over here. So much going on!! In the last 4 days I have attended 2 funerals & 2 children's birthday parties. I'm not sure which is more draining on a person.

My mom & dad's neighbor passed away suddenly of a heart attack on the 21st. He was in his mid 60's and a fairly healthy guy. It came as a shock to all of us. Then, 4 days later, his 44 year old son in law passed away from a stroke. So much tragedy for this great family.

Mom & dad really couldn't have picked better neighbors. Before we had the kids, we used to go out with them for dinner on the weekends. Danny always had a story to tell and he could bullshit with the best of them. His funeral service was very nice. They had a neat slideshow. I don't think there was a dry eye when "O Danny Boy" was sang.

After that, they asked if people would like to get up and tell a funny story or a fond memory of him. The one that came to my mind couldn't be told in church, so I'll tell you all here.

A few years ago we were at their house watching the Superbowl. The house was full of people mingling & talking. Danny & I were sitting across the room from each other. A commercial comes on the TV for Cialas. You know, an offshoot of Viagra. They are talking about the side effects and the announcer says "If your erection lasts for more than 3 hours, please contact a doctor". No one was paying attention to the TV but Danny & I. His eyes shot across the room to see if he heard that right. He caught my eye and he said "Well, I hope to SHOUT! 3 hours. I'm going to get some of that!" I about fell on the floor laughing. The look of shock on his face was priceless. I will never forget that. It was hilarious!!

We will miss you terribly, Danny Boy.

We attended his funeral on Friday. On Saturday we had to be at Chuck E. Cheese at 10am for a birthday party. I hate that place. The food sucks. The staff is a bunch of pimply faced teenagers with no clue what to do and it's dirty. Ick. I was so glad to get out of there.

Chuck E. is on the other side of Visalia, so I decided to go to the mall to find a bathing suit while I was in town. On a weekend. With both of my boys. Might as well add insult to injury, right? Do you know how hard it is to find a bathing suit that fit me, that I could wear in public and didn't look like I stole it from my mom's closet? Damn near impossible. I did find a halfway decent one after trying on the whole dept. In the dressing room for what seemed like hours with both boys on a candy & soda high from Chuck E. I'm lucky I didn't hang myself with one of those wretched bathing suits right there in Gottschalks. What a headline that would have made.

What happened to spring, by the way? Last Wed. we had the heater on and by Friday, the A/C was on. Crazy. It's humid and that makes me so damn crabby.

Sunday was a swim party for JJ's friend. I was actually kind of glad I went. You see, the mother of this child acts like she is "all that". She is president of the PTA. Fake boobs, fake nails. Way overdone hair. Drives around with her 4 kids in the big Excursion, but wait, gas prices got too high so she bought a new Mercedes to get around town. And her husband does all of the cooking. You want to smack her already, don't you??

Well, I feel so much better about myself now. She lives in a cracker-jack small house. It's is FILTHY! Not just dusty & cluttered like mine, but scummy dirty. Like she had never wiped her white doors down ever! And she has 4 kids, so you know how gross that is. And how does she get her "wonderful" husband to do all of this for her? She sells sex toys on the side. Yep, the president of the PTA is a sex toy whore. Lovely. One more reason why I want JJ OUT of that school.

Then today we went to the other funeral. He was an eccentric kind of a guy & I was so glad to see the big turnout at the funeral. My friend's husband gave the eulogy and he did a fantastic job. I don't think anyone could have done it better. I told him so later and he said "Something just came over me and the words just flowed."

We know what came over him. Charles got his last words out and I'm sure he was smiling down from above as the kind words and laughs were shared.

So, I've had enough tragedy these last few weeks. I am so looking forward to our Ya-Ya spa weekend. Only 10 1/2 days left, but who's' counting???